So you've been knocked down. The road ahead looks long and dark? You can't seem to find your way any more. The uncertainties are paralyzingly you. You look at your situation and wonder how God could possible change it? Your feet are weary and you wonder if you will make it another step?
Sweet daughter, I am here to encourage you in love, to help lift your downcast face up toward the the one who wants to fill your broken heart with His perfect unconditional, healing love.
God is fighting SO HARD for YOU right this very minute. His arms are stretched wide and you have every permission to drag your weary feet and collapse in His perfect, strong, protecting arms.
I want to tell you a story of my hopeless situation and how God gave me a simple promise in my darkest hour and how that promise kept me holding on and has now been completely fulfilled above and beyond anything I could have ever imagined.
We had been dealing my husbands drinking for more than a decade. We had faced loosing our home the year before, but this time we couldn't redeem it. He was so far into his addiction that I didn't even know who he was any more. He was an awful person to be around, and I took every opportunity to leave that house whenever I could. Many nights I would drive to empty parking lots and just sit in my car, alone, crying, broken, desperate. I hated him. I hated the addicted him. 3 of our 5 children were becoming depressed and expressing behavioral issues in various forms. We hadn't paid our rent in 6 months, because he needed that money to support his addiction. He was drowning himself in alcohol and when the drinking stopped keeping him from hating himself he tried to end it. He took a handful of pills one night and ended up spending two days in the hospital recovering. He was so consumed with addiction he didn't know how to get out and he despised himself. We had till the end of the month to pack our things and be out. I told him that when moving day came I was taking the kids and going some place where he couldn't hurt us any more. He laughed and said "Fine. Doesn't bother me. Have a nice life". Oh did it hurt. So bad. A couple weeks before we had to be out he went crazy. He had come home really drunk one evening. He was stumbling up the drive way and I locked the doors. I had the kids watching a movie and didn't want them to see him, so I tried to talk to him through the back door and tell him to leave. He refused and demanded that I let him in the house. When I objected, he became belligerent and punched through the glass on the back door. I can still feel my heart racing as I held the door with all my strength, tears streaming down my face, his hands trying to pry mine off the lock, the sound of the sirens approaching, and then flashlights rounding the corner. He called me the next morning begging to come home, but I told him he couldn't come back. I told him that I couldn't do anything more for him unless he would agree to get help. Reluctantly, he agreed to go to rehab. I packed him a bag, picked him up and drove him to rehab. When I dropped him off all he said was "I'm going to try but I know this won't work". It seemed so hopeless. I spent the next week packing our belongings, still unsure where we were going, and caring for our 5 children. Moving day came and all of our things went into a small storage unit.
Here I was, 5 kids, homeless, my alcoholic abusive husband in rehab, a broken shattered heart, and the road in front of me looked black. No sign of light anywhere, just darkness. How could God possibly do anything with this situation?? I felt so hopeless. It was in my darkest hour God gave me a promise to hold onto. He brought me to Psalm 71:20-21
Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once more.
God promised me that if I could just hold on, He would comfort me and restore my life again. I held onto to that promise with every ounce of strength I had. I marked it in my bible that day. I had no idea what God had in store for me in the days to come.
God spent 15 months rebuilding our family. He completely reconstructed our entire family. We went through some super rough times through the following year, but the work God was doing was absolutely amazing!!! He has completely restored our lives beyond what any of us could have ever imagined. We now have a beautiful home, where God is the center and addiction is defeated! Now that the addiction is gone, my husband is the sweetest most compassionate man. Now I get to watch him pray life over our children and myself. We talk about what God has planed for our future and we get excited. I have fallen in love with him in a way I never knew existed. God is so faithful.
My God has picked us up, dusted us off, clothed us in His best, and lined us up next to Him. Now we stand strong and steady next to the king, as sons and daughters with our rescuer. Amazing!!! Some times I can't even catch my breath when I think about how much He's done for us.
So, Sons & Daughters, rise, look to the heavens, and pour out your heart to the only one who can fill it with that perfect love you so desperately crave. Hold on just a little longer! Comfort and restoration are waiting for you.
